THE POWER OF INTROVERTS

There are a lot of myths about introverts. Introversion may be one of the most frequently misunderstood personality traits due to negative stereotypes and societal leanings towards extroverted traits.

Introversion is a personality trait characterized by a focus on internal feelings rather than external sources of stimulation. Introverts tend to be more quiet, reserved, and introspective.

If you can identify with the traits stated below, there is a 99.9% probability that you are an introvert;

You often prefer to express yourself in writing.

You prefer one on one conversations to group meetings.

You dislike small talk but often enjoy talking in-depth about topics.

Being around too many people drains your energy.

People think you are quiet and may find it difficult to get to know you.

You like to celebrate birthdays on a small scale with one or two close friends or family members.

You dislike conflict so you will rather stay far away from controversial issues.

You tend to think before you speak.

You do your best work on your own.

You prefer not to show your work or discuss your work with others until it is finished.

If you had to choose, you would prefer a weekend with absolutely nothing to do than one filled with events.

You are drawn to careers that involve working independently such as being an accountant, writer, computer programmer, graphic designer, pharmacist, or artist.

As an introvert, I can relate comfortably with the above but sometimes we are stereotyped as having depressive or negative slanting personalities such as;

Introverts prefer to be alone at all times.

Introverts are more prone to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety.

All introverts are shy and all shy people are introverts.

Introverts don't like to be around people.

Introverts don't make good leaders and public speakers.

Research even suggests that the majority of our teachers believe that the “ideal student” is an extrovert.

These are all fallacies. Introverts often find that people try to change or even suggest that there is something “wrong” with them. As a matter of fact, when introverts are pushed to be what they are not naturally wired for due to societal pressures, it could lead to mental health issues which can erode their confidence and they begin to question their existence leading to suicide ideations or even suicide. Parents watch out!

Introverts actually enjoy spending time with others but the key thing to remember is they will rather spend it with close friends and another peculiar trait to note is after a long day of social activity, they will probably want to retreat to a quiet place to think, reflect and recharge.

According to Susan Cain, author of a non-fiction book titled, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a world that can’t stop talking” argues that these personality traits are misunderstood and undervalued by society leading to “a colossal waste of talent, energy, and happiness”.

Sometimes extroverted qualities are overemphasized hence neglecting the quiet power of introverts. Most people think of introverts as being shy which is not always true. Shyness and introversion are not the same. Shyness is the fear of negative judgment while introversion is a preference for a quiet minimally stimulating environment.

The shy person is afraid to speak up while the introvert is simply overstimulated, but to the outside world, they appear to be the same. In many cases, people with this personality trait simply prefer to choose their words carefully and not waste time and energy on needless chit-chat.

An introvert is capable of expending a great deal of energy. They get the energy back by spending time alone for a while. I could be involved in some activities but sometimes when I feel drained, I step back not because I am opposed to such activities but I just want to lie low for a while to retreat and recharge.

Most often than not, when you act that way, friends, acquaintances, or even family members who seem not to understand you might feel you are not on the same page with them anymore. The fact is too much stimulation can leave us exhausted not necessarily from people.

Sometimes, we might enjoy large events, alumni platforms, and other group activities but want to sit and watch the action from the sidelines. Extroverts may interpret it as not wanting to have fun or participate, but the observation is actually fun for the introvert. We can be passive and at the same time committed.

While it is true that being successful requires speaking up and standing out, being able to deploy your natural strength is also crucial in attaining greater heights.

Many introverts are creative geniuses and their creativity has been featured in works of arts and science. There are many advantages to working alone, such as being able to focus on your thoughts and ideas which can stimulate innovation. When introverts are able to work independently, they tend to be more creative and innovative.

In many cases, being an introvert can be an asset which includes many benefits as outlined below;

They are good listeners

Introverts are good at listening, they tend to be able to listen to all kinds of situations without being too specific or defensive. Most times they are your go-to person either to vent or share the good news. You feel comfortable sharing confidential things with them.

They think before they speak

Introverts are good at processing information internally. Extroverted people are more likely to jump into a conversation when they hear another person’s opinion which makes them process information interactively. Introverts only speak when they have something to say and are strategic in how they harness their thoughts. They do not throw thoughts everywhere or randomly posting everything. They seem to have a deeper presence on social media.

They are observant

Aside from their listening skills, introverts also have the advantage when it comes to observation. They are able to sense subtle differences in people’s behavior. Introverts use their natural inclination in observation to improve their communication skills. They are good at noticing other people’s qualities which makes them comfortable to be in their midst.

They make quality friends

Since introverts tend to be around other people, they can feel drained by being around them which explains why they would rather have a few close trusted friends to spend time with as opposed to a large network of acquaintances. They are quite picky when it comes to who they bring into their lives. This quality causes introverts to be loyal and committed to friends.

They make loving romantic partners

Introverts are attracted to the intimate space between themselves and their partners. They can sense when their partner needs space too. The quality that makes them great listeners also make them great partners. Introverts tend to get to know their potential partner before they share details of their intimate relationship with a prospective partner. There is something about introverts that draws people in.

They can be thoughtful networkers

Being in a large group can be challenging for introverts, but they can use their natural gifts to create meaningful connections. Introverts rely on their inner voice and intuition to share their ideas. They can do this by communicating their ideas in a way that is private which can be developed in well-written lectures.

They can be excellent speakers

When it comes to public speaking, introverts are not nervous wrecks as they are often thought to be, they might actually have the upper hand over extroverts because introverts focus on preparing projects and thinking through before acting.

They are compassionate leaders

Introverts derive pleasure in accomplishing a task quietly. They take the helm of affairs out of a genuine sense of duty rather than a desire for the spotlight. They feel comfortable leading from the back and building an inclusive team. Since introverted leaders process information more slowly than extroverted counterparts, they tend to learn about their team members' abilities and passions more quickly which brings about a loyal, expressive, and trusted team.

It is also worthy of note that being an introvert can be beneficial to children. Raising introverted children requires a balanced approach. It is important that their needs are valued, allowing them to be introduced to new situations will help them develop their social skills and confidence. If your child has a specific talent or interest, encourage him or her even if it is not widely accepted or valued in the community. It is also important you do not impose friends or control how they make them. Most often than not, regardless of their age, they know what they want and who makes them feel comfortable.

Successful introverts that have made a positive impact on humanity are;

Albert Einstein; widely acknowledged to be one of the greatest physicists of all time.

Rosa parks; The united state congress called her “the first lady of civil rights and “the mother of the freedom movement”.

Indira Gandhi; was the first and to date, only female Prime Minister of India.

Eleanor Roosevelt, Warren Buffet, and J.K. Rowling to mention but a few have all contributed to shaping the world in a positive way.

The purpose of this article is to create awareness for people to understand introverts better hence my appreciation goes to friends like Feyisola Abiru, Dr. Nike Ajani, Mojisola Olayinka, Yetunde Ojo, Funmi Olagunju, and a very sweet family member who seem to understand and accommodate me.

It is also to encourage and assure introverts like me that introversion is not a personality disorder and we are not antisocial, rather we are socially different.

Be proud of yourself and do not struggle to fit into other people’s templates because if you do, you will lose your power, identity, and peace.

I leave you with these thought-provoking words and quote;

Solitude is a catalyst for innovation.

It is okay to cross the street to avoid making small talk.

The next generation of quiet kids can and should be raised to know their strengths.

“In a gentle way, you can shake the world”. (Indira Gandhi)

Reference

Susan Cain: “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a world that can’t stop talking”.